Go Gently, Go Strong

Structure + Compassion

Whichever words you use — goals, habits, intentions, or even those infamous resolutions — it all comes down to the stuff you want to work on, achieve, and improve. As I select my areas of focus for the year and the projects I’ll declare priorities this winter, there’s always that tidal wave feeling that tries to convince me they’re all important and should have been done yesterday. I allow that feeling with a familiar nod of oh-yes-there-it-is. It’s a natural part of the process of periodically taking stock and Planning with Perspective, as I’ve come to name it.

I was talking to my good friend Jill about this last Friday, and after we got off the phone she paid me a compliment in an email when she wrote: I always admire your planning ability around the New Year. It is as balanced with structure as it is with compassion, and that is a recipe for success.

Cultivate, Don’t Chop

There’s an old prayer I like to keep in mind that speaks of growth and transformation as being “more like cultivating a garden than chopping down a forest.”¹ It’s a great distinction because it reminds you that you can keep moving forward with an appreciation of where you are, who you are, and what you’ve got today.

The Right Balance

The right balance of structure and compassion is, as Jill noted, a recipe for success. It gives you room to breathe, to appreciate what’s good, and to enjoy your life now, even as you’re working on those items in progress.

Structure encompasses any or all of the following:

• Your organizational system, how you spend your time;
• Your habits, both physical and mental;
• Your strategy and approach, your support system and built-in accountability.

Just enough means understanding the specific type and amount of structure that will help you be and do your best.

The compassion piece has to do with:

• How you’re interpreting where you are now;
• What you’re thinking, what you say to yourself;
• How you deal with your feelings;
• How you look at challenges;
• How you treat yourself.

This Week’s Call To Action:

• Select a few things to focus on this winter. Set yourself up with just enough structure.
• Identify ways to practice self-compassion.

Remember that: Going gently is going strong.

Notes:
¹If you’d like the entire prayer, feel free to email me and I’ll send it to you.