A Big Move

Moving Day

My parents about to attend a luncheon for new residents, two days before moving.

After weeks of preparation, furniture shopping, logistics management, and multiple visits to Target and Bed, Bath & Beyond, I’m happy to report that my parents’ move to their new home went very smoothly yesterday. I’m so grateful to have found a beautiful Independent/Assisted Living Community that suits them perfectly. I must give a shout-out to Becky Feola, the referral agent and assisted living counselor who was instrumental in helping us evaluate communities. Thank you, Becky, for sharing your knowledge and perspective in such a caring way.

As I filled my parents’ refrigerator with the necessary staples and helped them organize their belongings, I was happy for them. I pictured them enjoying their new surroundings and am proud of them for braving the change. It’s funny that as we go through major transitions earlier in our lives (from college to marriage to kids and careers) we can dupe ourselves into thinking that after such and such major change we’ll be settled once and for all. Yet even in the elder years life requires us to make big moves.

Who Did You Get To Be?

In talking to my new client, Karina, last week, it was interesting that during just the second week of coaching she was having to deal with a major change at work — an anticipated layoff and outsourcing. While she hired me to contemplate a proactive career move, here she was being forced to move sooner than planned. That rug-being-pulled-out-from-under-you feeling is unnerving to say the least and produces a feeling of vulnerability.

During our conversation, I helped Karina identify what she was taking with her from the experience of working for that company. She is thankful for having been able to take an assignment in Germany, something that had been a lifelong dream. “Who did you get to be by taking that assignment?” I asked. Karina’s answer was that she got to be someone who was adventurous, a strong person who had done something that she had always wanted to do and succeeded. As she spoke those words out loud, she realized those qualities were truly ones she possessed even if she felt vulnerable in the moment.

Are You On The Move?

There are all kinds of moves in life: geographic moves, relationship “moves”, and career transitions, to name a few. Some are proactive and some life initiates for us.

What have been the big moves in your life? How did you handle those changes? Who did you get to be? You can apply those qualities and inner resources to any situation in which you find yourself. It’s also an effective check to conduct when evaluating a potential big move. For example, if you are in some way “on the move” now, ask yourself: Does this move allow me to be more who I am? If you can answer yes, it’s very likely a good move for you to make. If the change is going to happen with or without your consent, then adapt the question by asking: How can I be more of who I truly am —more of myself— throughout this move?

I’d love to hear your thoughts about big moves you’ve made and what you’ve learned from them. If you would benefit from some dedicated encouragement and support as you make your next big move, I’m happy to help.